I have been feeling like a loser from past few days. Cant blame the PMS , since its not that time of the month. I am 30, with no job and 2 kids. I needn't feel like a failure, bcoz S can and will feed us and take care of us.But deep down I feel inadequate. Men of my age, my own classmates. have moved up in career, have bought homes, have traveled continents, and few are new fathers too. But where here I am, finished engineering, worked for a year, got married, worked for 2 more years, had a baby and quit. And again joined back to work after a year and half and again quit to have another baby.
Nobody including S did not ask me or even force me to have kids. It was purely my decision to have them, and quit working and be with each of my babies at least for the first year.So it was purely my choice , but still whenever I meet somebody especially a man, of my age, I feel little envious, of his job, of his house, his sense of achievement, and also the respect he commands.
As a woman, I feel nobody acknowledges that bringing up 2kids with almost no help is a big deal. Lot of effort, sweat and even blood goes in raising kids. I feel its easier to work in an office, but its very very difficult to stay @ home and literally engage both the kids through the day. Whenever we happen to attend a function, S is called a "Complete Man". just bcoz he carries our kids, earn well and still takes care of them. But when I was working after my daughter was born, nobody called me a "Complete Woman". In fact I was accused of neglecting the child and getting back to work, when I dint have to earn a living. I just hate that nobody acknowledges the work a woman does in the house, let alone appreciate it.
Nobody including S did not ask me or even force me to have kids. It was purely my decision to have them, and quit working and be with each of my babies at least for the first year.So it was purely my choice , but still whenever I meet somebody especially a man, of my age, I feel little envious, of his job, of his house, his sense of achievement, and also the respect he commands.
As a woman, I feel nobody acknowledges that bringing up 2kids with almost no help is a big deal. Lot of effort, sweat and even blood goes in raising kids. I feel its easier to work in an office, but its very very difficult to stay @ home and literally engage both the kids through the day. Whenever we happen to attend a function, S is called a "Complete Man". just bcoz he carries our kids, earn well and still takes care of them. But when I was working after my daughter was born, nobody called me a "Complete Woman". In fact I was accused of neglecting the child and getting back to work, when I dint have to earn a living. I just hate that nobody acknowledges the work a woman does in the house, let alone appreciate it.
